Comments on: Chapter Eleven, First Draft

By: Sue

Sue — Fri, 08 Jan 2010 18:44:43 +0000

A comment above: “Shapeshifting time! That was awesome.” No doubt about that! Even more awesome in being able to do this. ;~) But do it willingly/knowingly – or just because it needs to be done?

“The idea stops me short. I hadn’t though about why Helene might have wanted Michael.”

Change ‘though’ to ‘thought’

““And it’s a man’s world, in your family? Staring with your father?””

Change ’staring’ to ’starting’.

““I forget to ask you,” I whisper, “what can I tell Michael?””

Change ‘forget’ to ‘forgot’

:~)

By: Pat

Pat — Wed, 22 Apr 2009 18:09:30 +0000

Hi Robin, Being let down isn’t on the radar… Digging deeper and peering behind the veils is! This story is very timely for me, on many levels. Looking forward to the next installment!

By: Robin Rice

Robin Rice — Wed, 22 Apr 2009 00:31:50 +0000

Not off topic at all, Pat. Why not write things that stir people up? In my view, that’s what writing is for. I don’t plan to let you down by offering you another version of the same… let’s hope for better than that from every book. Good, bad… buttons, loaded… oh yes, I love it!

By: Pat

Pat — Wed, 22 Apr 2009 00:07:38 +0000

Personally, I like the use of the words good and bad precisely because they are such “loaded” words… Look at how much discussion they’ve sparked in us!!! I love it! For me, I love the opportunity to explore the archetypal perhaps unconscious definitions of these broad meaning words within myself. When I can uncover the definitions and meanings that I personally carry of such simple (ha!) words like good and bad, I have the access to get to know some of the building blocks of who I am. That leads me to greater self acceptance and deeper wonderment of “me”… AND on a bigger level it helps me to tune into “the human condition”.

Many of Robin’s stories do this for me.

Anyway, thanks allowing me to share. Hope I’m not too off topic.

Pat

By: Camille Olivia

Camille Olivia — Tue, 21 Apr 2009 22:02:14 +0000

Robin~ From where I “sit”, I think the whole good/bad thing is perfect. Because, for me, it’s about balance. Using the words “good” and “bad” may be buttons (as Lara noted) but isn’t that kinda the point? Aren’t we supposed to GROW? Anyway, regardless of whether you choose those words OR “light” and “dark”, it’s all the same to me. I like the way Mayden is reacting…and that, too, is part of what makes your story so alluring. BRAVO!

By: Robin Rice

Robin Rice — Mon, 20 Apr 2009 19:01:04 +0000

Well, let’s see if I can pull this whole good/bad magic out of a hat for you all. It’s a challenge to have you all not know where I’m going, and also not have the page for you to turn. See if I go somewhere you like… And Nadine, I’d agree with you about spoiling the big choice…if that was what it was really going to be about! Hint, hint. And as for the blockbuster, if you are going for an action/adventure, I agree. I don’t want to lose a reader, but there will be some depth and slow parts… gives the reader a breath and also sinks down a bit. Hopefully, not so long, so slow, that we lose you. Again, hard to tell in this post-per-ten-days medium! I’m sure all of you will let me know if I nail it or not. Hugs! Robin

By: Lara

Lara — Sat, 18 Apr 2009 16:38:55 +0000

I’m just reading the comments after a week’s absence. And I just watched your video about good and bad. My thanks to Pat’s comment (following my first one) about good and bad – that really helped me. Here’s a question, Robin. Would using words like “light” and “dark” be better than “good” and “bad”? As Pat notes in her comment – seeing the bad as “wrong” is problematic – out of balance. But the word “bad” already is loaded with a value judgement of wrongness. The word “dark” is not loaded in this way. Perhaps such a shift in terminology could help the growing process of these ideas. Perhaps not. But this termiology issue is now on my mind after seeing Pat’s comment, your response that follows Pat’s, and the video.

Namaste,
Lara

By: Nadine

Nadine — Fri, 17 Apr 2009 20:28:36 +0000

In a blockbuster novel, something should be essentially “happening” on each page that compels the reader to continue reading. I wonder why two whole consecutive chapters were dedicated to this talk. It was very interesting to read up on the family’s history but I feel like too much was spoiled. Knowing so much already makes me feel less excited to read the next chapters. Announcing that Mayden has to choose between Jake and Michael might be more effective later when their characters have been developed beyond introductions. Then the readers would have more to consider as they consider who they would choose if they were in Mayden’s shoes.

By: Alesia

Alesia — Thu, 16 Apr 2009 23:58:03 +0000

This is so addicting! The plot thickens, characters evolve, magic unfolds…
I’ll instantly jump to the guys topic…hey I’m a teen, what can I say? lol. So now it’s between Jake and Michael. Jake, having more of a ‘magic’ upbringing is so interesting and quite frankly adorable, but Michael and his longing to be taught the ways of magic is also very interesting. Right now I’m leaning towards Michael though because I’ve seen more of him and not as much Jake. I’m excited to see how that unfolds!

I also like the idea about the balance between good and bad. It’s a cool twist on things that sparked my intrest and got me thinking.

Shapeshifting time! That was awesome. It’s all so enticing; thinking about all of the possibilities with magic and wondering just what is going to happen next with it.

The plot is incredibly interesting! I can’t wait to read more!

Love,
Alesia

By: Robin Rice

Robin Rice — Wed, 15 Apr 2009 00:47:19 +0000

Hi All! I’m actually really enjoying this conversation about good and bad so wanted to wait to jump in on it. But Pat, you nailed it… I’m not sure where it is going, or if I want it to go where it is going. I might have to backtrack, and that happens when writing a book. I’m okay with that if the good/bad thing sends me back to the drawing board. But I didn’t want to test the idea in only one chapter, and I have a feeling the Muse has something in mind with it, so I want to keep exploring. I’m okay with that, too, because good things can come from “wasting” my time.

I do know that shamanism, which has ancient traditions that I’ve studied in many cultures and formats, has a very balanced look at light and dark, good and bad. Also known as the right hand or left hand path. Even the symbol of the yin-yang shows that once something is too much of one thing, it naturally goes to the opposite thing. Very much an Eastern Thought kind of thing. So Anna may know that too much good would tip and start something bad.

Most books are obvious about good and bad–is Harry Potter good? Of course. Is He Who Can’t Be Named bad? Sure… So I think it is interesting to consider what if this were just stated boldly, upfront? What more could come of it? Right now, I’m not sure, but I am staying curious.

I’ve ideas for the next chapter, and look for my video coming soon in regards to working with this topic. We may scrap the whole good/bad thing, or we may find it takes its own tipping point and turns good/bad on its head. The only things I can say for sure is 1) I have tons of stories of a story going in a direction I am not expecting with my writing and 2) I don’t have an “agenda” for good/bad or any sense of preaching behind it at this point.

Hmm….. can’t wait to see what I write next. Thanks everyone for joining in!